Out Of The Closet: I’m A Football Geek

[Though I’ve made several attempts, Wordpress is being very unkind with the formatting of this post. Due to its timely nature, however, I’m posting it anyway.]

There are two things to which I’m devoted that I’ve managed to *never* mention on this site.  As for one pursuit, my friends are probably taking bets on how long I can go without mentioning it. (Heh. Try never, ever, you evil fiends.)  The time has come, however, for me to admit something about my twisted geeky self, though I may never again discuss it on this site after this post. (I’m not making any promises, though.)

I never thought I’d see the day when I would do something that would cause me to be ostracized by other geeks. See, geeks are generally a rather tolerant lot about most things (Vista excluded). So you can imagine my surprise when, after revealing my love for a particular pursuit, my geek friends pointed at me with their mouths open and made that weird sound from “Invasion of the Body Snatchers”.

I love football. Not college football, not run-up-and-down-the-street-annoying-the-neighbors-and-screwing-up-traffic football, but all day Sunday, Monday night, sometimes Thursday and Saturday National Football League football.

Yup. Coming out of the closet on this one. I *Love* Football. This geek has an official NFL jersey in San Francisco 49er colors, and every time they have a regular season (or gods willing, *post*-season) game, my ass is firmly planted in front of a brain-sucking electronic gizmo with a beer - or Bloody Mary if it’s a morning game; I am civilized, after all - keeping the faith.

This is not an anomaly where I come from. I was raised in the Church of Football. My mother was - and is - a die-hard San Diego Charger fan. I was raised a Raider Hater, and the only time I was allowed to say a word in their favor was if they were playing the Denver Broncos, because the only thing my mother hated more than communism, higher taxes, and the Reagan administration was John Elway.  If the Chargers won, dinner was late but it was perfect. If they lost, dinner was early and somehow burnt.  My step-father wasn’t a fan, but every woman in my house watched the games and I think he was just plain outvoted when he tried to snag my brother for non-football pursuits.

My brother did try to rebel once by rooting against the Chargers. My mother sent him to his room with no supper.
I left home at eighteen and my first act of rebellion was to leave said faith. For years, I didn’t watch a single game, but felt that my life was missing something. Seven years ago, I was invited to watch a game and I was sucked back into it like I’d never left. I owe those folks a debt. (They make me pay it by bringing beer every week because they have a monster plasma screen and I don’t. Fair trade.)
Today is opening day, my geeky friends. The first game after a seven-month dry spell, and once again, my beloved Niners are undefeated.  And before you point and laugh, know that there are many thousands - perhaps millions - of women like me who cringe at the sound of shoulder pads clashing together, but laugh with glee all the same. Hell, I know women who are more devoted than their partners - one friend of mine will glare at her husband if he so much as speaks a negative word about her team. Faith is faith, fans are fans, and football is queen.
Hi. My name is Maria, and I love football. Move out of the way - you’re blocking the game.

[Tomorrow, dotFiveOne will return to its regular, more geeky, progamming. ;-) ]
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